Best bits!!

So a quick round-up of an epic three-week trip.

Best day:
Biyamiti - seeing the Big Five in one day, with two Leopard sightings.
(but honestly every day was awesome and a worthy contender)

Best night:
Biyamiti - managing to keep the guys up until 1:45 drinking!

Best accommodation:
LaLuxe - definitely saved the best for last.
(Tofo came very, very close second)

Best pool:
Sodwana Bay Lodge - easy to get into, good temp, large, not too deep, deserted.

Best activity:
Microlighting - just simply wow, wow, wow!

Best catch-phrase:
Tony/Lu - "Get in!"

Best porkie:
Sue - "Ooh, I REALLY wanted to go on the zipline!"

Best accident:
Sue - I came close, but she had to be rescued!

Best bragging rights:
Lu - and her 18 kg King Mackerel.

Overall highlight:
Hmmm, there are so many possibilities: finally getting to see a leopard, cage diving with sharks, microlighting, that house in Tofo, the stunning sunrises/sunsets/moon-rise, the plentiful wildlife, heck just being back in Africa. However, while all of these are worthy contenders I do have a yet unmentioned highlight.

Simply reconnecting with all the gang again so effortlessly was definitely the best bit of the trip. I know it sounds corny (and clichéd) but lifelong friends were made in South America and now thanks to this trip those friendships have been cemented a little bit more.

Look forward to seeing you guys on yet another continent in the very near future!!

And that's a wrap!

So ended my latest African adventure. It really is quite difficult to put into words just how awesome this continent is, from the amazing wildlife abundant national parks, to the stunning seemingly never-ending sandy beaches, to the incredible marine life in the ocean. Everything is more special here - there's a wild and magical aura to being in Africa. It is a photographer's dream and an escapist's paradise.

Only in Africa does seeing such exotic animals so close feel like you have transported yourself into a David Attenborough documentary - a few times I nearly expected to hear his distinctive narrative while I gazed at the wildlife.

Only in Africa is there a 'wow' factor everywhere you go. The scenery, the animals, the weather, the activities, the people and the food. Wow, wow, wow! No holiday here is long enough and no amount of puny descriptions can really give you an accurate feel of the place - just trust me and go, see for yourself!

However, I must warn you, only in Africa is a piece of your heart stolen and never returned, thus ensuring that you must always come back in order to feel whole. In 2012 I fell victim to its charms and vowed to be back. Two years later I came good on my promise and mercilessly the continent recaptured my heart a second time (and worryingly, took even more!). It gives me great pleasure to have to renew the vow to return. Wild horses could not keep me away from this beautiful place. The Garden Route is calling...

23-Sept: London/Cork

Woke up in LaLuxe with a huge stretch in my mahussive extra-length kingsize bed and a smile on my face. All in all it had been a wonderful trip, yet another one to add to the remarkable pile. Every day had been picture perfect. We had seen incredible animals up close, including my elusive leopard. We had incredible weather. We had incredible accommodation. We had incredible companions, old friends and new. We had incredible tour guides, Pete and Kirsten I’d follow ye anywhere. We had incredible food, with ridiculous portion sizes. We had incredible fishing tales, diving tales, microlight tales, and more. God, I could gush on and on. However just before you stop reading because you hate me (or simply need to gag), please be heartened by the fact that all of my jubilation did not go unnoticed. Sadly Karma had me in his crosshairs – my perfect holiday was an abomination on every front, I was not to get away scot-free. Balance had to be restored…and so he planned to hit me with a vengeance; but more on this later.

Our final day was to be a nice casual relaxed affair.  We had an early 07:30 farewell breakfast. Utter glee radiated through the group when we discovered pancakes were on the menu!! I’m talking about tasty crepes here. I happily gorged myself on the stodgy goodness, alternating between my usual fresh OJ & sugar filling, and Nutella. Nom nom nom. I proudly was the epitome of restraint, only went back for third helpings and unselfishly left the last pancake for Kirsten (you’re welcome hun!).  With breakfast done and dusted it was time to bid farewell to everyone, bearhugs all round and invitations to come visit plus promises to do this all again were made. At this stage I should warn folks that I’ll be chasing up each and every one of these, mwhahahaha!!

The sun was shining and the final pool beckoned. My Durban to Jo’burg flight was not until 16:30, so a morning of chillaxing and final sun soakage was decided upon. First little shot Karma threw at me was an unregistered blip on my radar. Received an email saying that my first flight had been delayed until 17:30 – all good, no reason to panic, being the anal paranoid traveler that I am, I had left 3hrs layover in Jo’burg before my next connection, so even with that reduced to 2hrs that was more than enough time. 

Despite being just 100m from the beach the idea of getting covered in sand before boarding three flights home was not very appealing. Plus honestly I just simply wanted to veg – had three glorious weeks of rest and relaxation and one final day of the same was necessary before returning home. So spent the morning lazing by the pool in glorious sunshine with Francois and LaLuxe’s cute little Jack Russell, Trompie. Cab was ordered for us by the guesthouse for 14:30 as we figured we’d grab a late lunch at the airport.

At 14:00 we bid goodbye to the sun and donned our traveling garb. One last sneaky peek at WiFi revealed two more delayed departure emails from our airline Kulula; the latest of which did not have us arriving into Jo’burg until 22:00 – which was 80mins after our London flight was due to depart. Shiiiiiiiiiiiit!! Right, off to the airport we go and let’s see if this mess can’t be sorted. Really don’t think my boss would appreciate me ringing him Thursday morning going “Ahm, I’m still in Africa, sorry!”. Thank fook I took out travel insurance, surely there’s other flights that we can get to Jo’burg that will allow us to connect with our second flight. That’s the last time I’m going to fly with an airline that sounds like a liqueur!!

Taxi arrives bang on time, driver is a very friendly chap with a huge boombox system in his boot. He offers us his business card but we let him know that we’re heading back to Ireland and England respectively and unfortunately won’t be in need of it. While stuck in an extremely long traffic tailback he informs us that he has all the mobile connectors in case we have phones that need charging. Francois popped his iPhone in to give it some more juice just because the opportunity was there rather than out of necessity. (You can see where this is going right? Karma knocking again, very gently and unsuspectingly). Do we mind if he puts on some tunes? No not at all, go wild – might as well make use of that beast in the boot, and he does. Finally the tailback abates and we make unimpeded progress to the airport. The driver helps us unload our bags and while I pay him, Francois spies luggage trolleys and runs off to acquire one so we don’t have to hoist up the rucksacks unnecessarily. Say goodbye to the driver and he wishes me a most blessed flight. That’s a first, why thank you sir, and you have a good day too. 

As we enter the terminal building and start making our way to the Kulula desks Francois suddenly stops dead and looks at me in horror “My phone!”. Shiiiiiit! Yup, it’s still attached to the charger in the taxi.  He dashes outside and frantically tries to spot our driver. Sadly the taxi has left and after waiting about 10mins to see if perhaps he’d spotted the mobile and circle back, it became apparent that that ray of hope was unfounded. What to do next! Francois made his way to a guy at the Customs desk and explained the situation asking if he could use the guy’s phone to call the guesthouse and see if they could contact the taxi. Ringing the number for LaLuxe as listed on the internet just gave us a recorded message saying the number was not in use. Shiiiiiit! Why oh why didn't we politely accept the business card the driver had offered us earlier! Suddenly we had a lightbulb ‘ding!’ moment. We could ring Francois’ mobile using mine and perhaps the taxi driver would answer it. Multiple calls later and no, that also turned out to be an unfounded hope. I guess the pounding music being piped from the radio may have been too loud. At this time I think I should point out that the iPhone cover also contained all Francois’ bank and credit cards (not to bizarrely mention a Kasabian concert ticket for December!) – hence the extreme urgency in trying to locate the taxi. 

Meanwhile I figured that while losing all his stuff was a rotten disaster we still had the impending issue of not being able to get home. I made my way to the Kulula ticket office where three harassed looking ladies were dealing with some very irate South Africans. When it came to my turn, I gently explained that we had connections in Jo’burg that evening that we really had to make if at all possible. A customer to my left started getting very loud and aggressive when the Kulula staff suggested a train as a possibility; I meanwhile just smiled at my attendant and waited patiently while she looked at my BA booking to Heathrow and made some calls. Mercifully she put me and Francois on the standby list of three different flights, one for BA and two with Kulula, and told us to pop over to the check-in desks and see if they could accommodate us. I thanked her profusely – that seemed to go a lot easier than I expected. I had been having nightmare visions of having to pay excessive amounts of money to book an alternative flight and deal with travel insurance companies. Politeness definitely gets you a long way! At this point Francois mentioned that he always has problems when flying – friggin’ hell now you tell me! Note to self do not travel on the same day/flight as Francois in future, hahaha!

Managed to get two standby places on the BA flight and while waiting to board, I contacted Kirsten to explain our plight and asked if she could get in touch with the guesthouse directly on our behalf. In the meantime Francois managed to bang off an email to LaLuxe as well. At this rate the poor place was going to be inundated with frantic requests. Boarded the BA flight absolutely famished as in all the excitement we hadn’t had any time for lunch. Luckily there was an in-flight service and I opted for the free chicken sandwich on offer (oh yes living dangerously, you see I didn’t realize I was in Karma’s bad books at this stage).

Arrived into Jo’burg and gathered our bags. Found the nearest WiFi spot and logged on. Kirsten had contacted me saying that she finally reached the receptionist at LaLuxe and the taxi had been tracked down; they would return the phone to the guesthouse the next day. That worked out great as Jim and Sue were leaving to return to the UK and would be able to bring the phone with them. Job!! Francois also had an email from the guesthouse pretty much saying the exact same thing. Huge sigh of relief. All seemed cushty. Francois was one jammy sod! Started making my way to Terminal A with our bags when Francois was like “Woah! Where are you going?”. “Ahm, Terminal A, duh!”. Turned out that while both of our flights were arriving into London at the same time, we were leaving from different terminals. Great! Bid each other farewell, best of luck and headed off on our separate ways to Heathrow.

Got to the check-in desks and saw that I had to hang around for about 40mins before I could check in my bag (story of my life on this trip!). Started to feel a cold, clammy sensation come over me and felt a wee bit light-headed. Chalked that feeling down to having not really eaten much all day, apart from the chicken sandwich, and breakfast. Spied a drinks machine and grabbed a bottle of lemonade. Sat down on my luggage trolley (coz I didn’t have the energy to stand) and waited for check-in to open. Deposited my bag, passed through security and made a beeline for the nearest toilet. There I proceeded to puke my guts up, completely regretting my decision for taking that damn chicken sandwich. (Oh hello there Karma, so nice of you to finally pop by). 

Feeling rough as, but at least in no danger of imminent spewing I made my way to the departure lounge, found my boarding gate and waited for the flight to board. Mercifully the plane boarded quickly and being at the rear of the plane I was among the first group to board. Unfortunately they kept us on the gangway for quite some time as the attendants were sorting stuff. Again I began to feel a wee bit iffy. I was definitely going to need to use the washroom facilities and pronto! Are they open before the plane takes off?  I can’t remember!! Once I got to the plane I asked the male attendant who was checking my boarding card if the restrooms were available as I was feeling unwell. He gave me a worried look, took me to one side and inquired what exactly the problem was – turned out he was not an attendant but the friggin’ pilot and was not too keen on letting a sick person on the flight (especially with all the health scares that are currently going on in Africa). I looked at him incredulously and in my most reassuring of tones I tried to convince him it was merely food poisoning, dodgy chicken, and while I appreciated the third degree and how he had to do it for the sake of the other passengers, I really, REALLY needed the washroom, like now. I darted away from him and locked myself into the loo. Yet more chicken remnants – who knew a little sandwich could go so far. I looked at myself in the mirror, a frightening reflection greeted me. Gone was the holiday colour I had slowly acquired, and instead I came face-to-face with a ghastly mug displaying a pale pallor with a sheen of perspiration and the beginnings of dark circles under their eyes (no wonder the pilot nearly didn’t let me on). When I finally emerged there was a flight attendant waiting for me who said she’d keep an eye on me for the flight, at the captain’s request. Great! 

For the next 11 hours I must have frequented the bathroom at least every half hour. I became close hugging friends with the toilet bowl. Seriously, I wasn’t shy about it at all. We were very intimate by the end of the flight. I didn’t bother to turn on my on-board entertainment system as all I could focus on was my stomach and trying to figure out if I had enough time to get up and crawl over the sleeping passenger who had the aisle seat and reach a vacant restroom before puking. The airsick bag came with me everywhere on the flight, and I dreaded the fact that I might actually need to use it. Worst flight of my life!!!! If I could have slept it might have helped, but because I was awake the entire time, I was always conscious of the urge to get sick. Disaster!

Landed in Heathrow, having had no on-board breakfast as I could not stomach it - was as weak as a kitten with not an ounce of energy. Somehow I managed to gather my bag and push the trolley through T5 and started making my way to T2. Came over a wee bit faint, reckoned it was from the light exertion of expelling more energy than I actually had, so I sat on a seat and rested, waiting for the feeling to subside. Forty minutes passed as I people-watched and recharged. Only five-and-a-half more hours to go until my next flight – yay. Feeling a bit better I continued towards T2. Arrived at the Aer Lingus Bag and Drop knowing I was far too early but really needing to dump the bag I checked with the attendant the earliest time I could check in, explaining my crappy situation. He very kindly offered to take my bag as soon as the flight prior to mine took off. So basically instead of only taking the bag 3hrs before my flight, he’d take it four and a half hours beforehand. Honestly I coulda kissed him there and then – friggin’ sweetheart.   

Made my way though security, and headed to my final boarding gate. I felt like Death warmed up and pretty much looked like it as well. I contemplated curling up on the floor by the glass windows and going to sleep, but honestly did not think I’d have the energy to get back up on my feet, so instead I settled for securing two seats and trying my best to snooze until my flight was boarding. I even set an alarm to wake myself just in case I did actually manage to fall asleep. Despite every fiber of my being wanting to sleep, I didn’t. 

My flight boarded nice and promptly, and I foolishly looked forward to an on-time if not early departure. But no, we just sat there on the plane, no engines starting, just waiting. After a while the pilot came on the intercom saying that there was a problem with the windsock and that had to be adjusted, plus Heathrow had closed a runway so we would be on the tarmac for at least another 40mins and then we would have to see where we lined up in the taxi queue. (Karma you are taking things a step too far now. I know the holiday was excellent, but seriously you’ve had your fun – back the hell off!!!) I simply groaned, closed my eyes and prayed for sleep that didn’t come. 

Finally got back to Cork, and sailed through like a breeze. The immigration officer waved me on with the usual bare glance at the passport, my bag was again one of the first to come through, was back home in 15mins, shower and bed. It was such a comedy of errors and mini disasters that I have never before experienced, nor do I ever want to experience again. Still, despite this disastrous last day – I had a FANTASTIC holiday and would do it all again in a heartbeat.

* I have since learned that I was probably quick to blame the poor chicken sandwich, in fact it was more likely a stomach bug I picked up on my travels as some others of the group were also affected with these symptoms. However only I had the good fortune of experiencing them at 32,000 ft!

22-Sept: South Africa - Umhlanga (LaLuxe)

Left Umkomaas at 9:30 and made our way to Umhlanga, a residential, commercial and resort town north of Durban. Here we will be staying at LaLuxe guesthouse. We rocked up the the guesthouse at 10:30, too early to check in so we all piled into the minivan and headed down to the beach.

The golden sandy beaches here stretch northwards for more than 200 kilometres, all the way to the iSimangaliso Wetland Park. Sadly having left my camera in the 4x4, I have no photos for this afternoon.

We walked along the promenade, looking at the light-house and the unusual Umhlanga Pier, which was designed to reflect a whale bone structure. There were some pretty sand sculptures on the beach depicting the Big Five - very cool.

Pete rented two parasols and we made for the beach. Jim and Francois were the only ones in the group to brave the pounding ocean waves. The rest of us were content to doze, read and chat away. I very sensibly creamed up, and meticulously monitored my 20min rotations - turning like clockwork, not doubt resembling a rotisserie chicken, slowly cooking from the outside in.

At lunch we upped sticks and headed to a nearby restaurant. Cheeseburger sounds good and oh look, they do cocktails! I'll have a Strawberry Daiquiri please. This setting definitely demands slushy ice. Lu and Karen are also swayed to join me for cocktails, they both opted for a Mojito. 

My Daiquiri arrives and I'm disappointed to see that it is a day-glow neon pink colour. Um, no real strawberries were used in the making of this baby, and that's for sure. Took a hearty sip and sure it is refreshingly cool, it is not however how a Strawberry Daiquiri should taste - pity! Kirsten meanwhile raves about her scrummy Vanilla Milkshake. Lunch arrives and I cave, also ordering a Vanilla Milkshake. It arrived and oh my god, it may just have been the best damn milkshake I have ever had. Creamy goodness. It was consumed within minutes and I was half-tempted to get a second, but that would be excessive.

Cameras come out, it's our final day, group pics are taken. There's talk of a photobook being created so we need to get more people shoots. Hehe, bit late now for that folks. Still, I'm sure that once we pool all our photos together there should be more than enough content to make an awesome memoir of this trip. Francois entertained us with a funny story from his past, a dilemma involving attempting to open a bottle of rum and a toilet bowl. (You had to be there!) 

After lunch we make our way back to LaLuxe to check-in. The entrance to the guesthouse has a Koi pond with some very large fish - not as large as Lu's 18 kg King Mackerel, but still, they are fairly huge!! There's a very nice pool, and a cute little Jack Russell called Trompie who is bounding about delighted to see new guests who will play with him.

I'm staying in the Executive Suite. It's got an extra-length king size bed with Egyptian cotton linen, a large flatscreen TV, a little kitchenette, a spacious living area with comfy couch and a balcony with sun loungers. The bathroom contains a large bath, his 'n' her sinks, plus a dual head shower (perfect for the couple that want to shower together but have different water temperature requirements!). Plus all the lighting and air-con is controlled by a touch-screen panel on the wall. This panel is also responsible for the music system that is being piped in through the ceiling speakers!! Get in!!!!!

Dinner was booked at a Greek restaurant called Olive & Oil. Starters consisted of three huge platters: Vegetarian, Meat and Seafood. I bravely tried the tiny fried baby octopuses - extremely crunchy and weird! Had a nice Mediterranean Chicken pasta dish for main and a melt-in-the-mouth delectable Chocolate Slice for dessert.

Francois very generously bought two bottles of Champers for the table and duly made a speech. Sad to think that this is it, our time together has come to an end and this is the final hurrah. Yet as we all clink glasses I'm sure that this will not be the last time we do this.

21-Sept: South Africa - Umkomaas (Umkomaas Guest House)

Another gorgeous morning in Africa! Oribi Gorge beckons today; it is a canyon in southern KwaZulu-Natal that boasts cliffs, forests and spectacular hiking trails. We decided to head up to Samango Falls, carefully picking our way up rocky paths and trundling towards the top. Disaster! The waterfall was completely dry - still got to see some lovely views though.

Next up, Leopard Rock Coffee Shop, which has got one of the most wow-inducing views I have seen. The panorama of Oribi Gorge is simply breathtaking. Beautiful orange beaked hornbills and glossy starlings flitted about the trees, greedily nabbing chips that were offered by staff. After quenching our thirsts Lu and myself headed out onto the ledge that is "Leopard Rock" - a seemingly perilously rock that makes for impressive photos. The rest of the group joined us, some more hesitantly than others.

Pete had mentioned that the gorge offered the highest swing in the world, that was equivalent to launching off a 55 storey building. He also had agreed to do it if I did - oooh challenge accepted Mr. Deverson! You fool!! Plus for the less adventurous there was an option to zip-line across the gorge.

Sadly time on the day was not on our side - darn that leisurely start!! The waterfall walk had taken us longer than expected and Pete now feared that with it being mid-afternoon queues at the zipline and suspension bridge would be too long (you are warned the wait can be anything up to three hours). Considering it was not peak season, I was a little suspect at this reasoning, I'm sensing fear Mr. Deverson, pure unadulterated fear, mwhahahaha!

Unfortunately, seeing as no-one else seemed dead set on wanting to do the blood-pumping, scream-inducing activities (one outta eight is not good odds when you are the lone one), it was instead decided to head back to the lodge along the coastal route and go shopping for the BBQ that Pete had planned that evening. A facetious Sue, having safely assured that we had traveled well over half an hour, piped up from the back "Ooh, I REALLY wanted to go on the zipline!". Cheeky little minx! Hehe!! We all got a good laugh outta that mahussive lie.

Driving along the coastal route (plus all along many of our drives to date) we came across fields and fields of sugar cane, as far as the eye could see. The roads were busy with massive double trailer trucks carrying the freshly chopped sugar cane to the processing factories. We also spied many trucks carrying the refined sugar for bagging. Umkomaas is located in the province of KwaZulu-Natal. The sugar cane business is a staple industry in South Africa and Mozambique. There are over 42,000 sugar cane growers in South Africa. KwaZulu-Natal has 14 sugar mills and is the epicenter of sugar production. Because cane needs to be processed within 24 hours of harvesting, the mills are located close to the plantations.

Cane cutters have an extremely tough life, for six days a week they cut the cane from dawn to dusk in an effort to meet their daily target (approx. 140 rows). If targets aren't met, wages are cut. If targets are frequently not met, the cutter is at risk of losing their job. For this reason many don't take breaks, work even when they're sick - they work until they reach the target. Most young people are unwilling to take on this profession because of the stigma, high levels of exploitation, low wages and long hours. Seeing women with babies strapped to their backs picking weeds in the plantations was quite humbling. Suddenly a boring desk job stuck in front of a computer all day doesn't seem so bad. A lot of things get put in perspective in Africa.

Back at the lodge, while Pete and Kirsten rustled up our final BBQ feast, the pool table was centre-point to some intense games. Tony turned out to be a bit of a shark, despite his protests of how he hadn't played in years, and him supposedly carrying a back injury!! He wiped the floor with every contender. Myself and Kirsten severely struggled to pot our balls during our little tussle. In our defense it is next to impossible to pot balls when you are laughing uncontrollably!

Cards were introduced and the ever-popular Shithead was decided upon as the game of choice - albeit with very different rules to how I usually play. Multiple games were played ensuring that everyone had the pleasure of being crowned shithead. While I may have collected the title of 'Shithead Champion' (losing four times in total over the course of the night, and three times in a friggin' row!!), Jim has the pleasure of being the current reigning Shithead - a title he cannot relinquish until the next time he plays...good luck with that there Jim!

 

20-Sept: South Africa - Umkomaas (Umkomaas Guest House)

I had mentioned to Pete that I'd be interested in cage diving with sharks, so he signed me up to do it when they were out on one of their dives. I'd tried to cajole some of the others to join me, but none of them were having any of it. 07:30 start so that meant a 06:30 breakfast. Sheesh, I'm getting to be a dab hand at all these early morning starts.

As I made my way down the stairs I was greeted by someone saying "Morning". I halted my progress and did a quick scan of my surroundings, which revealed no-one in plain sight. Thinking I had imagined it, I took another step forward. "Morning!". Okay, who the hell said that, I am clearly the only person about. Reached the bottom of the stairs quite bewildered (please bear in mind it was 06:20ish). Finally I got an extended greeting "Good Morning!". Ah ha, gotcha!! Twas only Lou-Lou the parrot looking for a bit of attention. I strolled over to her cage and found myself going "Good Morning!" to her. "Hello!" was her response. Shaking my head in disbelief I went to grab some food.

Went down to the Umkomaas dive shop with Pete, Tony and Francois, who were all scheduled for two dives that day. Got kitted up in a wetsuit and fitted for some fins as Shaun, the guy at the dive shop said I would have the option of snorkeling with the sharks if I wished. I did tell him that I'm a poor swimmer and so that would not be an option, but he just shook his head and told me that I'd change my mind when I was in the water and to take the fins just in case. Our group were the only customers diving and I just had to share the cage with one other person. Result! I'm liking small groups. Plus, was well impressed with the number of crew that went with us, we had the skipper, and five other divers.

Morning is overcast which was perfect weather conditions for me, assuring that I wouldn't fry while waiting for the divers. Sea-launch off the beach. Our skipper was giving instructions on how he wanted everything to go and when to climb on.  The best way to haul yourself in is to spring from the knees and go head first into the boat then swing around sit on the edge, put your feet into the foot straps and keep hold of the rope that is all around the edge. Piece of cake right? Bah, I was really hoping that he could beckon me aboard before we hit the water. Not sure if it was because I had a look of panic strewn across my face or if it is common practice, but thankfully he ushered me onto the rib before we got started. Result! Seriously I have zero upper body strength and would not have been able to haul myself into the rib from the water (as I discovered when snorkeling in Tofo).

We rocketed off out to sea and headed in search of some oceanic blacktip sharks (who can get up to 1.5m and are known to make spinning leaps out of the water while attacking schools of small fish). Came across a small boat that had a group of ten people snorkeling in the water. "Look at the fins" the skipper remarked. Sure enough, there were sharks zipping in around the group. All of a sudden there was flash of grey and the sound of smacking water - one of the sharks had leapt out of the water and rolled mid-air. Holy crap! "Did you see that? Did you see that??". Incredible.

The pull of the current was quite strong so we headed a little bit further from that group and then the guys lowered the cage into the water. "Cage divers in!" said the skipper. So I made my way towards the cage. Looking back I was not a bit apprehensive or nervous about this. Here I was happily agreeing to pop into the water with what are portrayed to be violent vicious creatures and I've not got a care in the world. Now I'm not completely barmy but I figure that this venture are these guys bread and butter and they really are not going to put valued customers in a perilous position. Safe as houses it is; granted to a point. Obviously there's no accounting for the stupidity of customers, "Well hello there Mister Shark, coochy-coochy-coo, oh dear you seem to have bitten off my hand!".

Anyhoo, I lowered myself into the water, surprised at how warm it felt, popped the snorkel in my mouth and under the water I gazed. Holy crap!!! There's sharks everywhere, EVERYWHERE! A bag of chum has been attached to the bottom of our cage and they are all coming to it to have a munch. They are beautiful creatures, moving so effortlessly. It's a spectacular sensation, looking out underwater into the murky horizon and then suddenly out of nowhere a shark looms, gliding towards you, filling up your field of view. Beautiful! Actually, wait a minute what are those creatures that are shadowing the sharks, worryingly they look small enough to get through the cage grid. Ah ha, okay, on closer examination they are not wee sharks, they are suckerfish (remoras), phew - however those teeth still look none too friendly - so you keep outside the cage buddy, capeesh!!

I lifted my head out of the water to clear my snorkel and got a wee bit of a shock to discover we were drifting about aimlessly in the sea and the boat was nowhere in view. Hmmmm, interesting! Still, there's awesome activity happening under the water so get your head down lady! Unfortunately about twenty minutes into the dive I started to get quite cold, all the inactivity and pretty much staying stationary is not good. I'm now beginning to rue not asking for a rash-vest.

The guy sharing the cage with me was six-foot-three and skinny as. He was shivering uncontrollably and had fed the fish due to the choppy movement of the cage on the surface. I checked that he was okay and if he wanted to call the boat, he assured me he was fine, so not being able to do anything for him, I popped my head under the water again and kept moving my legs in a cycling motion to get a bit of blood flowing.

Such astounding sights, I'm nearly considering doing this all again tomorrow morning. Shaun swam over to the cage and asked if I wanted to get out and snorkel - I'll admit I was sorely tempted, but I know I would have been flapping my hands about like a mad one as I'm not confident enough to snorkel by simply finning alone. Instead I'd have draw the attention of the sharks and ended up as dinner for sure. That would have given the divers below quite a show.

Lasted another twenty minutes in the cage but then I had to surrender, the cold was too much, plus I was feeling a wee bit queasy. Popped my head up, saw the boat in the distance and waved for them to come over. "You've about 10-15mins left" the skipper informed me, "thanks but I'm bloody freezing, I seen loads and am delighted with what I've seen, can I get out please".

Hopped aboard the rib and immediately began to tremble violently. Luckily the skipper had loads of waterproof jackets. Shimmied into one and tried to get warm. The guys on the boat pointed to my legs and had a good laugh. I looked down and saw that my calves had ballooned hugely after my time in the water. So that's what happens when a wetsuit is too big, I released the seals at my feet and half the ocean flooded out, hehehe.

"Have a lollipop", Shaun said. "Emm, no thanks", stomach would not appreciate that I think. "No, seriously, it's good to get rid of the taste of salt, and give you a bit of sugar energy". Dubiously I took the lolly offered and popped it in my mouth. Bad idea! A few mins later I leaned over the side and fed the fish, just a little. Apple flavour - nice! The divers came up from their shark viewing session. They were also frozen to the bone. Jackets and lollipops are fired off in all directions and we huddled together to try and generate some warmth. If only the sun would peek out from the overcast sky twud heat these jackets (and us) right up.

We moved on to the next dive destination, guys had only been up about twenty mins, not even and were heading down again. Francois was shivering uncontrollably so the skipper gave him another layer to put on under his wetsuit. Hopefully that will make a bit of difference. However, once you are cold, it is very hard to right yourself. Pete decided not to do the second dive as he was too cold and didn't reckon he would enjoy the dive. While waiting for the divers we chatted, kept an eye out for breaching whales and I fed the fish a second time. Seriously!!! I do not get sea-sick, I'm blaming it on being so cold and from my snorkeling position in choppy water. Thankfully by this stage I had warmed up a bit.

Beach-landing was next on the cards, the skipper lined up the rib, timed the waves, and tore onto the beach full steam ahead, driving the boat into the sand. Thwack! Clinging onto the ropes prevented me going head first into the diving equipment. Nicely done! Plus our landing was a lot gentler than the Tofo one. We alighted the boat and after taking the few obligatory pics, made our way back to the trailer.

The dive shop's 4x4 was on the beach ready to get us back to town. In order to drive onto the sand, the air had been let out of the tyres. When we returned to the tarmac, the trick was to use the compressed air tanks to fill the tyres up again. However the tank the driver had was not working so she sent an African lad back to the beach to get another. I was a bit agog at how she treated him. "Go get a cylinder, hurry now, run, run" and she clapped her hands at him to indicate the haste needed. As he made his way she rolled her eyes and tsked after him. When he made his way back to the truck, she guided him to the tyre she wanted filled, again admonishing him when he didn't react quick enough for her liking. It was a bit surreal and unsettling to witness such behaviour. It's definitely a different way of life over here.

On the way back to the dive shop we spotted our gang sitting on the veranda of Waves. (They had been for a lovely walk along the beach in our absence). Made my way to the cafe after getting rid of the wetsuit at the dive shop and I entered the terrace to rapturous applause for my 'bravery', haha. Twas enough to make a girl blush to her toes! Seriously, I love these guys to pieces, best traveling posse in the world!!!